Today I walked into my room and I looked for my puppy.She's been gone now since last May and I'm not sure why she still so echos so much in my life. I swear I still hear her nails click on the kitchen floor. Every time my duvet cover gets turned over to reveal the golden material I double take thinking it's my sniffles.
Maybe it's because I am particularly lonely lately. But I still have that slight heartache that comes with the absence of something familiar. She was the perfect companion. I remember sitting against my bed countless times crying and she would glance at me making her sad puppy eyes and come and sit right beside me. She never said anything, she never asked for anything. She just heaved a big sigh as if to say "yeah, I know". Sometimes I stop and listen because I swear in the myriad of noises I hear that her sigh was in there somewhere.
Ok yes, she did have some health problems and she didn't always smell the greatest because well- I was lazy- I didn't like always giving her a bath. But she was an excellent watch dog and a resilient adventurer. I hated towards the end not being able to take her on runs or walks because I was so afraid that her being deaf might perhaps endanger her. But in her younger days she traipsed with the rest of us, braved the frozen creek and braved the freezing water just to get to the other side with us and chase our sleds down the hill. She courageously fought off unwanted critters and took several "hits" for the team knowing full well a tomato and vinegar bath would result (skunk).
I was never afraid and never alone when she was near. Probably because she had the makings of what good friends do- she knows all your dirt, she knows what you can do and you don't, she knows what you have done, and she still sleeps beside you. She still begs to take a walk with you, and she still sits beside you in your tears.No wonder I miss her.
So hear is a poem I wrote about her last summer in my first ugoogely
Dear, dear Sniffles....We didn't name you peaches.
Like my brother wanted.We names you sniffles, cause you sniffled a lot.
And cause I picked that name and I was the favoritist.
Your ears smelled and you had health problems.
But you still were pretty cute.
With gentle wooing and a dog biscuit you learned to sleep on my bed till I kicked you off at 3am cause you hogged the bed.
You went on walks at midnight and protected me from scary Grouse.
You were brave when the car hit you.
You sat down and sniffed with me when I cried.
You pretended to be in shape and catch sticks.
What a good, good puppy because you even tolerated the dumb cats.
You were a good, loyal puppy.
Towards the end you couldn't see or hear.
But you could smell... you could always smell.
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